Friday, August 29, 2008

armpits and vodka

What's up party people? It's the last weekend of the summer. This, coupled with the fact that I am having a FAT DAY has Tiddy feeling a little bummed out. It is not my fault that I discovered the BLT at Brugger's Bagels this week!

So remember the cardigans I was bragging about on Wednesday? I wore one today and you won't believe what happened! I was driving in my car and felt a draft under my left armpit. There was a gigantic hole in my brand new sweater! The entire seam was ripped about three inches. I took a whiff of my armpit. Was it possible that my body odor was so rancid that it burned a hole in the fabric? Or was I a victim of faulty stitching?

Of course it was the latter. Tiddy smells like an angel.

In other news, I bought a bottle of Stoli Blueberry at the liquor store yesterday thinking it would be the perfect spirit to mix with club soda. I was severely disappointed. I wanted a delicious blueberry cocktail and got unflavored vodka flavor instead. Blueberry Stoli doesn't have nearly the flavor that orange Stoli has. Those of you who attended WVU know what I'm talking about! Stick with the old standby. Orange Stoli never disappoints.

Mister Ferguson is turning dirty thirty this weekend! In preparation, I made an assload of pepperoni rolls and we are headed up to the lake for the next three days. I will not be blogging until Monday evening so I want to remind everyone to tune into the GOSSIP GIRL season premier on Monday night. If you are not currently a Gossip Girl watcher, please consider becoming one. Although it is about high school kids, it is seriously one of the most entertaining and scandalous shows on television!

I'm sure you will all be boozing this weekend, so I will leave you with a list of things that are impossible to say when you are drunk:

1. Thanks, but I don't want to sleep with you.
2. Nope, no more booze for me.
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?
5. I'm not interested in fighting you.
6. Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing.
7. I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I'd hate to look like a fool.
8. Where is the nearest toilet? I refuse to vomit in the street.
9. I must be going home now as I have work in the morning.

Have a great weekend and make it one to remember. West Virginia plays tomorrow! Go Mountaineers!


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